Hi All. This post is actually not that easy for me to share, but I want to be real and I want you to get to know me, the real me.. I’ve cried many times in my life, I’m an emotional person and not only have I cried when I’ve been sad, but also when I’ve been mad, and happy, and frustrated. Well, you get the idea. I hate doing it, but after I do it I feel relieved. I see it as my way to release that knot that I have in my throat! Does anyone else feel like that?
Anyway, the last time I cried was about a week ago. My 2-year old son and I are really close. I stay home with him everyday so we spend a lot of time together. Even though we’re practically attached at the hip, he enjoys spending time with his uncles, aunts, and grandparents. I let him spend some time with my mom at a birthday party and as usual checked in with a phone call. My mom told me he was fine and having a great time at the party. I was busy at home, but started to miss my son. It just feels different when he’s not around.
My mom ended up bringing him home at around 9pm. When I opened the door to get him, he was half asleep and half crying because he did not want to come home. I thought that as soon as I carried him and soothed him he would calm down and go to sleep. I mean, he didn’t see me all day, he must really want to spend time with me, right? Wrong! I tried to take him from my mom’s arms and he was not having it! I’m talking about kicking and screaming! I had never experienced this with him so I did not even know how to react. I took him forcefully and practically ran to his room to put him in his bed.
When I lay him down and tried to sleep next to him he was just pushing me away. Like I mentioned before, I had never gone through this with him so it was all new to me. I tried and tried to soothe him by rubbing his back, and head, but he was not interested. By this time my mom had already left and my husband came into my son’s room. I signaled him to take over the situation and I walked out of the room. All I wanted was to hug my son tightly and for him to hug me back. I went in my room and started crying. I was pushed away by this little boy that I love so much and it really broke my heart.
My husband was finally able to calm my son down and get him to sleep. I had to realize that he wasn’t acting like himself and that he was tired and sleepy and just wanted nothing to do with anyone. I had to accept that it was not personal, even though it felt like it was. Now my husband had to calm ME down and get me to sleep haha. Anyway, this incident has been repeated already but I’m happy to record that no more tears have been shed on my end! Has this ever happened to you mommas out there? How did you get through the first time?
Thanks for stopping by!